Why Men Cheat

I need a man’s advice on something I’ve been dealing with for a long time, again and again. My question is very simple. Why do men cheat and think they can get away with it?
Sincerely,
Miss Take
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Dear Miss Take,

First of all, that’s a good question and you aren’t the only one dealing with that issue. Trust me on that one.

To answer your question, I must point of a few interesting things. First, you’re question may be simple, but the answer is complex. I hope you can swallow it. Second, why have you been dealing with this issue “again and again”? Did he cheat on you AGAIN? I’m glad you requested my opinion because some women would have told you that it was his fault that he cheated. Look again. How many times must he cheat on you for you to learn? No offense, but this happens all too much. He cheats, you forgive. He screws up again, you forgive. He thinks he can get away with it now, so you forgive him again! What is this?

I apologize. Now let me answer your question. And keep in mind that what I say in the following only applies to these good-for-nothing cheating men, not the decent men of the world.

First, why do mean cheat anyway? Good question. It can be for any variety of reasons. It all depends on the condition of the relationship and the people involved. Many men cheat simply because they feel that they can get away with it. It’s like cheating in class. If you know you can get away with cheating on a test, then why waste time studying? Just cheat. You’ll get your A anyway. So, women, if there are no punitive measures or repercussions for infidelity, then why should you expect him not to cheat? Don’t be upset if and when he does. Basically, it’s like you’re just letting him do whatever he wants to do. Maybe you should tighten your grip on your man. A dog shouldn’t be let off his leash, ever.

“But what if I trust him?” you ask. Oh please. Why would you trust a dog over your own intuition? Is his name Lassie? Didn’t think so. Ruff ruff!

Further, a man may cheat because you cheated on him first. This is very uncommon simply because the man is usually the one who cheats first. If the woman cheats first, she normally has a good reason to do so and she’ll never get caught. Women are brilliant, right? However, IF it is revealed that you have cheated on him, he’s going to do one of three things: (1) leave you; (2) cheat on you; or (3) a combination of the first two. Also, he’s probably going to want to fight the guy you slept with. He’ll probably lose the fight and look stupid in the process. I digress.

Why does he always get caught, you ask? We men-folk are inferior beings when it comes to the art of infidelity. We have not yet mastered it as have our female counterparts. Let’s look at it one way. Women are naturally the more organized sex. Hence, they will carefully plan out an act of infidelity so that the man will never even suspect something is going on. If he does suspect something, a woman will always have an alibi and a friend to back her up. Pure genius!

Men on the other hand…

Think of cavemen, homo sapien retardenesis. Rubbing rocks together, still trying to make fire and impress the other cavemen. Men are so busy trying to impress other men (yes, I said it correctly) and on the grind to be the first to get the “next best thing” that we sometimes forget to cover our tracks. It’s true. And we pay for our mistakes. Time and time again.

I’m running out of time.

In closing, I say this: choose better men. There are enough of them around. And to the men who are mad at this, do better.

Sincerely,
Doctor J

(one of my articles from The Maroon Tiger student newspaper '08)